[Yamaguchi] [Soulmate!AU] Half A Heart

     

Yamaguchi Tadashi x Reader  [ Soulmate!AU ]
Soulmate!AU where a timer on your arm counts down to the moment you meet your soulmate

---

He could still remember the first time he met you.

The way your large adolescent eyes peered up at him in awe was forever etched into his mind.

Later, he discovered the reason why you were staring so intently at him- because you had never met someone with freckles before. Instead of teasing him like the other kids his age, you seemed genuinely intrigued by the marks peppered over his cheeks; and his young self automatically developed a certain fondness for you.

00 : 00 : 00

Yamaguchi learnt the hard way that he wasn't the same as other children. He wasn't made fun of just because of looks and appearances.

They alienated him because he didn't have a soulmate.

For as long as he could remember, his timer had always been lined with zeros unlike the rest of his peers. While his classmates were preoccupied with figuring out how many years they had left in their countdown, he was left alone, resenting how fate had turned on him, leaving him with a faulty timer; a person cursed to be alone forever.

Until you came along, Tsukishima had been the only one that treated Yamaguchi as how he would any other person. The blonde had always had a sharp tongue, but even with his harsh words, he still let Yamaguchi remained by his side. It was the last year of elementary school when you moved into town, quickly fitting in with them to form an unusual trio.

If Yamaguchi were to describe his life as the night sky, Tsukishima would be the moon- a constant that wanes but never disappears. But you... you would be the only star that shines in the endless sea of darkness.

Your laughter was all it took to brighten up his day, a smile directed at him being enough to send his cheeks ablaze. Growing up together, there was one thing that became clearer and clearer with each passing year.

He was in love with you.

After two years in high school, Yamaguchi matured a lot, his self-confidence growing, along with his physique through all the training and friends he made in the volleyball club. One thing that didn't change, was the fact that he never dared to confess his feelings for you.

Unlike him, you had a ticking countdown on your arm, and he wanted nothing more than for you to be happy, even if it meant breaking his own heart.

~~

"Tadashi, wait for me!"

Hearing your voice made him turn around, watching as you caught up to him amidst the students making their way out the gates. After a long week of exams, school was out for summer vacation and everyone was more than eager to get a head start on their holidays.

"Hey [Name]," he grinned, taking in your excited appearance as you started walking beside him.

"It's a week from now, Tadashi!"

"What is?"

You gawked at him expectantly, making him shift uncomfortably beneath the weight of your stare, making him feel like he was forgetting something important.

Rolling up your sleeve, you showed him your arm.

173 : 22 : 30

"Oh..."

Seeing the crestfallen expression that flashed across his features, you nudged him lightly. "Is something wrong?"

"No, not at all!" Scratching his cheek with a finger, he asked, "Are you excited?"

"Of course!" You sang out, a huge smile hanging on your lips. "There's going to be a summer festival on that night and I'm going with some girls from class. Do you want to come along as well?"

"I don't know, [Name].... You're going to be meeting your soulmate... and you have the girls with you too..."

"But I'm going to be super nervous, and I'd honestly feel a lot better if you were there with me! We can ask Tsukki too!"

You gave him a pleading look, your lower lip jutting out a little as you peered up to him. It was hard for Yamaguchi to say no to you, especially when you had that look in your eye.

This time, however, he couldn't give in.

If it were just any other day, he would gladly tag along with you if you asked him to. But the festival fell on the night when you would meet your soulmate, and he definitely didn't want to be there.

"Sorry, [Name]... I don't think I'm up for it."

He was already losing you to someone else.

He didn't want to witness it too.

~~

The movie that was playing on the television appeared to Yamaguchi as nothing more than meaningless images and stifled sounds. He stared blankly at the screen, time slipping away while he remained lost in thought.

When the ending credits started to appear, he took a quick gander at the clock hanging on the wall and sighed heavily, shifting to lie down on the couch, ignoring the bright glare of the light.

'She should have met her soulmate by now...'

His feelings were in a huge turmoil when he thought of you. A part of him was dying on the inside, knowing that you belonged with someone other than him; while another part of him was glad that you would be able to find a sort of happiness that he could never attain.

The darkness that he tried to cage up started to loom over him; all the bitterness and resentment he felt as a kid starting to appear again.

Everyone else had a soulmate, so why didn't he?

Squeezing his eyes shut, he let out a quivering breath. A loud ringing sounded through the house, interrupting the storm of emotions that ran through him. Getting up slowly, he picked up the home phone.

"Hello?"

"Why didn't you answer your phone?!"

The freckled boy nearly winced at his best friend's sharp voice on the other side of the line. "Ah, Tsukki. I'm charging my phone in my room so I didn't hear it... What's up?"

"It's [Name]... She suddenly ran away and the girls couldn't find her anywhere. They were hoping that you knew where she was, but when you didn't answer they called me instead.... Her phone is turned off, so I can't reach her either."

"S-she's supposed to meet her soulmate today, so maybe she's with him?" He didn't want to believe that anything happened to you, but he found himself starting to worry.

"Maybe... maybe she forgot to tell them. Maybe –"

"Yamaguchi. I wouldn't bother calling your house if everything is fine and dandy."

He felt a sinking feeling in his chest when Tsukishima paused to let out a sigh. After hearing what the tall middle blocker said after that, Yamaguchi immediately hung up and dashed out of his house.

"...One of the girls saw her crying when she ran away..."

Yamaguchi couldn't think straight.

His body was moving automatically, eyes searching desperately for any semblance of you, any indication of your presence. Yet he couldn't locate you at the festival grounds or in the vicinity of the area.

His legs were starting to ache from running so much, but he ignored the pain in his muscles and pushed on.

All that mattered to him was finding you.

He stopped at the side of the road as he caught his breath, wishing he hadn't been so impulsive and brought his phone out with him. How much time had passed since you went missing? Yamaguchi could only guess, hoping that you were safe, at the very least.

One of the things you hated the most was to cry in public. It was probably because of Tsukishima's constant teasing, but over the years, you started to grow a strong distaste for showing vulnerability when you were surrounded with people.

So when he heard that you were crying when you ran away, his heart filled with apprehension and his first response was to get out of the house to search for you.

Wiping off a drop of sweat that appeared on his forehead, he let his head tilt backwards to look up at the horizon.

Few clouds could be seen on the clear summer sky, and the moon was at its fullest, reflecting a soft glow upon the world below, with tiny stars peppered all around; constellations presenting themselves to those who could identify them.

Then, it dawned on him as suddenly as a shooting star. Breaking into a sprint, he ran towards the only place left to search.

The area was just as he remembered it.

Situated near his grade school, Yamaguchi often hung out at that playground with you and Tsukishima after school. Being there brought back fond memories, and he recalled you ever telling him that you still visited the playground when you were feeling down.

The fleeting relief that he felt seeing you on one of the swings disappeared when he got closer. He recognized the yukata you were wearing as one your mother bought not too long ago whilst making a trip into town- he was there when your mother showed it to you.

Traditional clothes fitted you splendidly, he realized; and with your hair done up in an immaculate style, held together with a pretty pin, you looked like an elegant mirage from the past.

You were quiet when he walked over, eyes downcast as you stared lifelessly at your hands resting on your lap.

"...[Name]..."

His heart lurched when you looked up at him with your reddened eyes, slightly swollen from all the crying. The sight of him made you tear up again, his name escaping your lips in a trembling whisper.

Taking a step closer, Yamaguchi circled his arms around your form. You remained limp in his embrace, forehead leaning against his chest as tears fell silently down your cheeks.

"I'm here for you."

You let out a choked whimper at his words before starting to cry in earnest, hiding your head in his chest as you gripped onto him. The sound of your sobs made Yamaguchi feel like crying too, but he bit back the tears, knowing that he had stay strong in order to be an anchor for you; someone you could rely on.

He wished there was some way he could take away your pain, but he couldn't do the impossible, so he did his best to comfort you, holding you close to him as you wept.

As your crying reduced to muffled sniffles, you let your arms fall from his waist, wiping away the dampness on your face. Yamaguchi shifted to kneel down in front of you, not caring that his pants would get dirty.

"...Better now?" He looked up at you with concern written all over his countenance, and you nodded in response.

"Everyone is really worried about you, you know..." He murmured gently, "Why did you disappear, [Name]? Did something happen?"

Moments passed before you finally opened up, voice hoarse as you spoke, "I missed it... I fucking missed the moment..."

His eyes widened as he realized what you meant.

You missed the chance to meet your soulmate.

"Did you- did you try to find him? Maybe he's looking for you too."

"I looked everywhere, Tadashi!" You burst out, burying your head in your hands. "We practically walked past each other but I was too much of an idiot to notice my timer ring... After that I tried searching, but I didn't see anyone else who was looking for their soulmate.

"I messed up so bad..."

The sleeve of your yukata slipped to your elbows and Yamaguchi frowned when he saw your arm.

00 : 00 : 00

Amidst the row of zeros, were scratches and crescent shaped marks marring your skin. "...Your arm!"

Immediately pulling down your sleeve to cover your timer, you averted your eyes from him, clenching your arm tightly. "I don't want to see it anymore... I want it gone!"

"[Name], stop." Prying your fingers away, he stared at the scratches left by your nails. "Stop hurting yourself..."

"I don't need this as a reminder," you spoke with bitterness as you glared at those digits.

Yamaguchi felt a stab to his chest. Those were things he used to tell himself everyday when he looked at his own timer. But hearing those words from you made the ache ten times worse.

He hated seeing that look on your face.

"There's still a chance for you to find him." Yamaguchi suggested, "We could ask around school to see if anyone missed his countdown, and if he's not from Karasuno, we can try asking people from the neighboring schools!"

"What if he already graduated? Let's face it... I won't ever find him... What am I going to do, Tadashi?"

Choosing his words carefully, he said quietly, voice filled with conviction, "If you really can't find him, you'll cry and stay depressed for weeks, and you'll feel like the world is too small to contain the pain you're feeling.

"I know it'll hurt, [Name], but the pain won't last forever. Eventually, you'll be alright. I promise you that given time, you'll get better and learn to smile again.

"There are plenty of people who missed their countdown and found happiness later on in life. Yeah, it's not going to be the same as being with your soulmate, but it's still possible to fall in love like any other person."

Sensing your gaze fixated onto him, he looked up to you, lips twitching up into a small smile.

"Whatever happens in the future doesn't matter. All I know is that I just want to stay by your side, always.

"I don't think you ever realized it, but even if I only have half a heart left, you're the person that I've fallen in love with."